I received a very nice and interesting letter from a reader over the weekend. Not an e-mail, mind you, but an actual two page, single-spaced letter on real stationery, sent to my actual address.
The young woman who wrote to me had some very wise insights to share about differences between the generations, but it also got me thinking about the differences between e-mail and a letter. As someone who receives hundreds of e-mails, don't get me wrong, I appreciate each one. But the time that goes into writing and sending a letter, the fact you physically hold it in your hands and it becomes a part of your life, all come together to create a unique feeling. Of course, one of the most delightful parts of receiving a letter is that an instantaneous response is not expected--nor even possible.
For many people, the only thing they receive in the mail are bills. Let's do a small thing to change that, and reserve a slot one day a week for sending just one handwritten letter. Do you have a lonely grandma in your life? Maybe she is just waiting for someone to ask her advice. Or a friend that you've wanted to be in touch with, but never seem to have the time? Well, why not sit down and write her a letter--it will probably make her day.
I'm currently reading your first book, and relating to so much of it that I thought about writing you a letter just the other day. I agree that real letters are much more meaningful than emails. Maybe I will write to you now that I know you would actually appreciate that!
Posted by: Rebecca | September 17, 2007 at 01:24 PM
I relate to what you're saying here.. I have so many email addresses that give me the illusion of being in contact when really I fail to keep in real open dialogue with the majority. I love writing letters but well, my Granny is the only one who is not on the net so I do send her cards instead. As for asking for advice no, I have never really done that I have had a habit of seeking the worst for that in the past.....
Posted by: Priya | September 17, 2007 at 07:34 PM
I just blogged about this last week, Wendy, and I agree with you. Emails and instant messages certainly have their advantages, but still - there's something very sweet and special about receiving a real, handwritten letter. I love writing and receiving letters. I correspond by 'real mail' with one of my cousins, and yesterday I received a lovely postcard from a blog friend in Scotland. It really made my day.
Posted by: Anna S | September 18, 2007 at 12:49 PM
Perhaps, Wendy, you can issue a challenge to your readers, to get at least two real letters out a week? We cannot let this fade.
Posted by: Katie | September 18, 2007 at 02:25 PM
I would suggest two but when you take on something new it's generally best to start small. Otherwise there is a tendency to get discouraged.
So I hereby issue a challenge to my readers to send out at least one real letter out a week! Pick a day and make a pratice of it. It will have a calming effect on your soul.
Posted by: Wendy | September 18, 2007 at 04:41 PM
I agree. It is a personal touch that makes things so much nicer. I think that sometimes we underestimate the value of small acts of kindness. It is the little things in life that really matter the most. Like you said Wendy, things are often so lovely when they are unexpected. I very much agree with these sentiments. If only we would be a little more thoughful and engaged in random acts of kindness, the world would be a much better place. :)
Posted by: Rachel | September 18, 2007 at 11:23 PM
With global warming, peak oil, epidemics, food and water shortages, war, a global credit crunch, and other problems in the near future, it's possible that the Internet and other forms of technology will disappear and that we will ultimately return to paper and pencil.
One group advocated it some time ago, and you can write to them at:
The Lead Pencil Club
PO Box 380,
Wainscott, NY 11975
Posted by: Ralfy | September 19, 2007 at 10:35 AM
I do enjoy & value e-mail (and have a 24/7 North American long-distance phone plan because I love talking to friends & family) but I really do appreciate "real mail" when I get it, too. I have 2 filing cabinet drawers full of cards & letters because I can't bear to toss a letter someone actually took the time to write. It is lovely to go back and look at the letters exchanged over the years from old friends. Recently a friend who finally got rid of her unreliable computer sent me a letter and said "I know you're busy so I don't expect you to write back". I found that so sad! Thanks for the challenge, Wendy, I will definitely be taking it up.
Posted by: Elin | September 23, 2007 at 04:34 AM
You are a blogger / author / letter writer after my own heart Wendy! Thank you for fluently sharing this experience with us and issuing an important challenge. Thank you also commenters for responding with such enthusiasm. Taking back the letter is my mission (visit www.LetterLover.net), and knowing Wendy is an advocate makes it that much easier. Your thank you note is in the mail Miss Shalit =)
Posted by: Samara O'Shea | September 26, 2007 at 12:15 PM
Although I most often communicate with technology I think that a key difference between a text message and a letter is that with a letter the communication seems to be more "cosmic" and the recipient appears to be everywhere and transcendent whereas with a text message it can only come back in one place and as you mentioned Wendy you can expect an instant response which almost negates what is being shared if it is more than factual information... there is more sincerity possible that way. I have started to write blogs many times but the publicity of it has always frozen me to a certain extent, I think letters are very personal that way and can remain so because of the lack of reliance on airtime and suceptability to hacking etc... I have found that with letter writing the whole world responds and with emailing or the equivalent it is very much narrower
Posted by: Priya | October 04, 2007 at 07:59 AM
I agree with Priya. While emails and text messages are our norm often for communication, personalizing things always adds a nice touch. In recent times I have tried very hard to pick up the phone and chat with my loved ones rather than email. Even if you only talk for a few minutes that "personal" touch really does wonders. Also, I think that at times with communication that is done via internet or text message there is potential for misunderstandings. On msn when I chat with others I often use the emotion icons to help convey my feelings. At times it is hard to tell if someone is joking, being sarcastic, is upset etc. However, when you actually chat with someone in person or on the phone their emotions are more easy to read and understand. Body language is also helpful.
Posted by: Rachel | October 18, 2007 at 08:44 PM