(Bad for) All-Ages
I hope that everyone had a wonderful 4th of July--or Canada Day (as you can see, I am a very inclusive person).
Much to report but first, I am eager to get your take on "all-ages" clubs. A very young friend of mine was recently sexually assaulted at an all-ages club, and I have to admit that I find the very idea of an "all-ages" club quite disturbing. Whose great idea was this, to have 13-year-olds bumping and grinding with 28-year-olds? The same people who think it's "cute" for 4-year-old girls to look "hot," no doubt.
For those of you who asked, the April Harvard conference on the future of feminism turned out to be quite fascinating, and so was the Swarthmore event. Over 300 Swatties attended my talk and the Q&A; and even the hecklers were interesting! Stay tuned for a report on the college scene next.
Meanwhile, although I took a hiatus from blogging, I am pleased to report that I have personally answered all letters I've received (with the exception of Jacqueline's from Mississauga and Joanna from Syracuse, just received yesterday). But now that my son is starting a playgroup for part of the day, I plan to catch up with all your emails next. So please don't think that I don't appreciate your brilliant insights and inspiring stories--I truly do.
Speaking of which, I think it's significant that much of my support has come from high school and college students, whereas my critics tend to be older and tend to pre-judge these girls without even hearing their stories first. What I've realized is that we need a revolution in the way we approach these issues: a new vocabulary and a new concept of female empowerment. Hence the title change of my new paperback, in bookstores as of this week.
The new edition also includes a study guide for classrooms and book clubs, so let the discussions--and the revolution--begin!
I think that all-ages clubs are extremely dangerous. One of my biggest pet peeves is the fact that you can't buy 'girls' clothing anymore--just adult women's clothing in small sizes.
A 13-year-old's idea of fun is very different than an adults, even if she wants to pretend it's not.
Posted by: Angie | July 11, 2008 at 01:56 PM
I have never heard of all-ages clubs before, but they sound ridiculous and dangerous. I wouldn't feel comfortable going to a club, and I'm 21 years old. How on earth can we expect 11-year-olds to be safe in that environment?
I like the new book title and cover.
Posted by: Anna | July 11, 2008 at 06:34 PM
I think the idea of "all ages clubs" are very scary because all ages really means ALL ages. Such clubs are packed with underage teens and "dirty old men". There are guys who specifically go to such clubs to prey upon young girls like vultures and there is nothing that stops them. Parents need to be more aware of such clubs and watch out for the interests of their children.
Posted by: Rachel D'Souza | July 12, 2008 at 09:21 PM
As long as the people are twenty years old or older, I see nothing wrong with mixing people of all ages. Those people who do not feel comfortable talking to anybody who is not their exact age, always have the option of not doing so. But at least this way, people are not so segregated. I draw the line at twenty years old, only because up until that age, a person can still be considered a child, or at least not yet a full adult.
Posted by: Raymond | July 13, 2008 at 12:13 AM
To Elizabeth who posted this on the Facebook discussion group for this book, re: all ages clubs--can anyone go up to that girl and talk to her? Many people are talking behind her back, but who is going up to her and talking to her?
The guy seems a lost cause. . .
"Elizabeth (Central Jersey, NJ) wroteon Jul 11, 2008 at 2:05 PM
. . I can't pretend I don't know some kids under 16 who wouldn't be all over that...but for those kids we need to set social boundaries to keep them from the dangerous situations which could erupt from parting in an all-age club. This reminds me of something I learned this summer about statutory rape and their (lack of) consequences. I recently learned that a guy friend (ex-friend now) who I thought was interested in me was really just trying to get into my pants and I was telling this to a friend who explained to me his history. As an older senior in high school he was 19 and sexually involved with a young 14 year old freshman. When he dumped her my friends reported that the poor girl would walk into class depressed and weeping everyday. . . .and they are still involved with each other....and he is getting away with it..."
Posted by: Angie | July 13, 2008 at 07:58 AM
Yikes. The idea of all-age clubs makes me rather apprehensive. Even among teenagers, there are significant age differences: the fun one has in high school is just not the same as the fun one has in college. I mean, we do have reasons for not allowing high school age kids to most college parties. With this in mind, why should we condone the idea of all-age clubs?
Posted by: Kat | July 14, 2008 at 09:27 AM
Your best bet to stop this is at the root. Make clubbing as a whole less "cool" and less teens will even consider doing it. All-ages nights won't be of financial worth to club owners when they can't get enough of the right demographic as customers.
Petition celebrites to call out clubbing as lame. IF they do, you'll see the cage rattled as you desire. But, given that most celebrities are just over-endorsed children, I doubt that happening anytime soon.
Posted by: Rofigo de la Mancha | July 18, 2008 at 07:08 PM
I have to admit that I find the very idea of an "all-ages" club quite disturbing. Whose great idea was this, to have 13-year-olds bumping and grinding with 28-year-olds?
Pedophiles?
I'm surprised this hasn't showed up on South Park...
Posted by: Headless Unicorn Guy | July 22, 2008 at 01:48 PM
When I was in highschool "clubbing" was the coolest thing to do. Thankfully, my parents took my whining (and screaming) and refused to let me go. I have heard countless stories from friends of the older guys that try to grope them there. These are truly scary stories, which have left me feeling very comfortable, say, in the library.
Headless Unicorn Guy: if it's not to bold to ask, what happened to your head?
Posted by: Patricia | July 29, 2008 at 08:25 PM